Joel: "I'm an imperfect person and I have my flaws. For instance, how I crunch my chips when I eat them."
Me: "Well, I know there are things about me that are far from perfect or that you don't like."
Joel: "Yeah, the thing that is not perfect about you is that you complain when I crunch my chips when I eat them."
Me: "Well, if you didn't crunch your chips, I wouldn't complain. Sooo...it's of your own doing why I'm not perfect."
Joel: "It's a catch-22." -pause-
Joel: "By the way, do you know how much concentration it took to not crunch my nachos tonight during the movie?"
Me: "What?! Oh my gosh. I feel kind of bad."
Joel: "Yeah, it went something like this (does sing-song voice): pick chip up, dip in cheese, insert in mouth, close lips, chew chew chew."
Me: "Wait a second, you're telling me you had a SONG?"
Joel: "Not really. It just took a lot of thinking to not crunch down on those first delicious bites."